Making Big Decisions

As an example for developing the steps to a good decision, let’s define your problem or challenge as:

What are you going to do after high school? [Or if you have already completed high school, consider “What am I going to do after college, university, or training program?”]

• meet new people

• further your education in general

• further your education in a specific field of interest

• gain work experience

• determine what career options are available/attractive to you

• have fun and enjoy yourself

• begin to establish a career

• develop more personal independence

• develop a specific skill/talent/trade

• be able to begin to earn an income

• improve self-confidence

• associate and join with friends

• consider what’s important to parents/guardians

Begin by identifying the factors that are most important to you as you consider what you will do after high school.

Many criteria could be important in making this decision. Which of those listed are most important to you? Are there other criteria that are important to you that aren’t listed here?

Pick the 3, 4, or 5 criteria that are most important to you in making this decision.

Next, consider your options and possibilities. What could you do next year? Possibilities include: university; college; training; apprenticeship; getting a job; travelling; taking a year off; internship; volunteering; starting a business; and so on.

Pick the 3 or 4 options that are of most interest to you.

You now have a list of criteria – what is important to you in making this decision. For example:

1. Alignment with Your Values and Goals:

   • Core Values: Does this decision align with your fundamental beliefs and priorities?

   • Long-Term Goals: Does this decision support your aspirations and where you want to be in the future?

   • Sense of Purpose: Will this decision contribute to a sense of meaning and fulfillment in your life?

2. Impact on Your Well-being:

   • Physical Health: How will this decision affect your physical health and well-being?

   • Mental Health: Will this decision promote mental and emotional wellness?

   • Stress Levels: Is this decision likely to increase or decrease your stress levels?

3. Relationships and Social Connections:

   • Loved Ones: How will this decision affect your relationships with family and friends?

   • Social Support: Will you have a strong support network in place after making this decision?

   • Community: Will this decision involve moving or changing your community?

4. Financial Considerations:

   • Financial Stability: Can you afford this decision?

   • Long-Term Financial Impact: What are the potential financial implications of this decision in the future?

   • Earning Potential: Will this decision affect your earning potential or career prospects?

5. Personal Growth and Development:

   • Learning Opportunities: Will this decision provide opportunities for personal and professional growth?

   • New Experiences: Will this decision expose you to new experiences and challenges?

   • Comfort Zone: Does this decision push you outside your comfort zone in a positive way?

6. Risk Assessment:

   • Potential Risks: What are the potential downsides or risks associated with this decision?

   • Mitigation Strategies: How can you minimize those risks?

   • Worst-Case Scenario: What's the worst that could happen, and can you handle it?

7. External Factors:

   • Timing: Is now the right time to make this decision?

   • External Pressures: Are any external factors influencing your decision?

   • Opportunities: Are there any time-sensitive opportunities associated with this decision?

Consider your first option. Think about it in terms of the criteria that you have identified – that is, what’s important to you? Go along and consider each criterion one at a time. If there is a really good fit – that is, that option would really fit well in achieving that criterion – give it a +2. If it fits, but just somewhat, give it a +1. If there is no link, positive or negative, give it a 0. If there is somewhat of a bad fit – that is, it is somewhat against what you think is important – give it a -1. If there is a really bad fit, and it would go quite counter to what you think is important, give it a -2.

Complete the grid for each of your options putting a score for each under each criterion.

After you have completed this exercise, add up the total points assigned to each of your options. Now you probably hope your job is done – and your decision is clear. Well, it may be. But that may not be the case. This is a process to help you make a good decision. It doesn’t necessarily tell you what your decision should be.

Why is that? Why isn’t the option with the highest score the one you should select? The reason is because there is no real way of accurately measuring the intensity of the feelings inside of you – how strongly you really feel about something. What this exercise does is force you to think about each option in relation to what is important to you. The numbers will give you some idea of what seems to be right for you and what isn’t. But, when all is said and done, you’ll have to look at each option and decide how strongly you feel about it. It may be that the option with the highest point total may drop to number two in terms of what you really want to do. Number three may move to the top. The process helps you to consider options, weigh options, think about things, and so on. It does not make the decision for you. It is up to you to make the decision.

Get a second and third set of eyes on your matrix. Ideally, someone you trust to not just be affirming but rather is able to take perspectives and offer helpful criticism that you may be blind to.

Once you have been through steps #1 to #4, it is time to make a decision. This is the step that people often want to delay or avoid altogether. It can be the hardest step of all because we often want “to know for sure.” We want to be “right” – and make a decision we know is best. But, quite frequently, that certain “right” answer won’t be there. You will have to make the decision – and it may be a hard decision. But, if you follow these steps, they should help you to make the best decision you can. But there is one more step.

When you can, look back later and evaluate your decision. If necessary, and if possible, change the decision based on what you have learned or experienced. Some decisions, of course, you can’t change. If you decided to go to university, and you did, and it didn’t work out for you, and you were disappointed and wish that you had done something else – well, chalk that up to experience. 

The decision was made and the action was taken. But you can now factor that decision, and what you learned, into future decisions. But you will have used the available time, money, and other resources to go to university. They are not available now for another choice.